PUNSTERS
The Annual Pun-Off
Is finally here
Not just a one-off
Oh no, it happens every year
Which is the definition of annual
The Annual Pun-Off
Really exists
What makes people groan or moan
Makes us pump our fists
STEVE
It was raining cats and dogs yesterday. I stepped in a "poodle."
PUNSTERS
Yes!
Been going for the 40th year running
Yes, competitive punning
Is a real thing
A thing for reals
That grown-ups do for fun
Awkward word nerds pun
DALE
They say a good pun is like a steak:
A "rare" "medium" "well done"
But here we pun better than anyone
Which is impressive to almost no one
ROSY/STEVE
We own the groan
ALICE/JAN/JODY
We binge the cringe
DALE/ROSY
Shooting up addictions with a pun syringe
PUNSTERS
We take it super seriously and get excited
Even though it’s universally derided
ALESSIO
I’m the "laugh" of the party!
PUNSTERS
We never let a pun be left unpunned
And so from all polite society we’re shunned
It’s a real thing
A thing for reals
That grown-ups do for fun
Awkward word nerds pun
JODY
You may never ever get a husband or wife
But you’ll be accepted socially for once in your life
PUNSTERS
At the Pun-Off
At the Pun-Off
ALESSIO
It’s the only shot you’ve ever got at getting laid
'Cuz in every conversation you throw a grenade
PUNSTERS
At the Pun-Off
At the Pun-Off
The perfect pun is all of our white whale
There ain’t a train a’ thought we won’t derail
We’re not listening to anything that you’re saying
We shoehorn that wordplay in
At the Pun-Off
JAN
We’re like terrorists seeking ruination
We’ll fly a plane into the building of your conversation
Yes, that’s a reference to 9/11
We just want our 72 "versions" of words in pun heaven
PUNSTERS
At the Annual Pun-Off
We’re tragically pale
Please keep the sun off
You’re almost translucent
Use the SPF you sent
To the Pun-Off
There’s a girl named Dale
Who’ll twist the English language into a pretzel
If not her, then that weird guy in sweats’ll
It's a disease
Please just kill me please
Or if you won’t mercifully end me
Then just send me
To the Annual Pun-Off
To the Annual Pun-Off
It’s the Annual Pun-Off
It’s the place where all our stupid dad jokes
Become super duper rad jokes
At the Pun-Off!
